Interminable

I don't know what a meteorologist or a farmer would say, but for me the longest day of the year has to be the 24 hours leading up to the start of the NCAA Tournament. Back when I had a real job, I couldn't get any work done this day; I was either scrambling to finish my bracket, or I was surfing the web for information about the tournament. Now that I work from home, I still don't get anything done. So here are a few quick thoughts as we count the minutes to the first tipoff.

Barry Bonds
Don't pitch to him. Walk him every time he comes to the plate. He is a great baseball player and deserves to be in the Hall of Fame, but he does not deserve to have the opportunity to try to overtake Ruth and Aaron. You can't erase his home runs because there are too many other players who come under question, but baseball would bebetter off if he went away, so just don't pitch to him. Is it unfair? Maybe, but it's not like he's been playing fair either. Some people I have proposed this idea to said pitchers should take it one step further and hit him every time, but I think that's a little extreme. Plus it sets up a retaliation scenario and could even be legally actionable. So tell him to take his bat and go home.

Wizards
Is it just me and the Wizards or is does every NBA fan feel like Michael Corleone in the Godfather III? After a great February brought them within sight of division-leading Miami, the Wizards lost five of six with inconsistent efforts and a propensity to give up second -half leads as they quavered before any All-Star they played. So I was done hoping for anything better than last season's second round exit. Fine, I was free and clear of the heightened expectations that almost always bring disappointment and pain. Then, they pull me back in, beating the Pistons and sweeping a home-and-home against Charlotte. Now, Charlotte is not exactly the Jordan's Chicago Bulls, but suddenly Washington has won three straight and is back in the five spot. If they can win two of the next three (Dallas, Chicago, New Jersey) before they head out West, I guess I'll have to call Luca Brasi and go to the mattresses for them again.

Movie Night
If you won't be glued to CBS and ESPN for the next four days and are looking for something to watch other than what you can find on TV, go pick up "In Good Company," starring Dennis Quaid, Scarlett Johansson and Topher Grace. It's a nice comedy, remarkably, but not regrettably, devoid of any jokes involving body functions (not that there's anything wrong with them). It turns the "dating the boss's daughter" plotline inside out when Grace takes over as Quaid's boss and falls for the teenaged Johansson. I also liked that it mostly avoids the pat ending, although some of the plotlines resolve more predictably than your average Brady Bunch episode. Throw in a great cameo by Malcolm McDowell as a global tech age CEO (think Kenneth Branson meets Caligula), and it's a very enjoyable two hours. (Who's creepier, McDowell, Christopher Walken, or Crispin Glover? I go with Glover because I think the other two guys are acting). So put "In Good Company" up there in the Dennis Quaid Top 10, but not Top Five (Breaking Away, The Big Easy, The Rookie, Everybody's All-American and Great Balls of Fire. His roles in Traffic, The Long Riders and The Right Stuff were too small to be considered). My main gripe is one that the filmmakers could not have foreseen, and that is the inclusion of Peter Gabriel's "Solsbury Hill" in the soundtrack. By now, this song has to be meloda non grata in any movie. If you don't know why, click here.