Relentlessly Unbalanced Bog Poll

Happy Monday, everybody! Today's post title comes courtesy of an enthusiastically loquacious (or is it loquaciously enthusiastic) Associated Press writer whose coverage of the Xavier-UVA blowout provided me with some chuckles as I reviewed last week's play of the Bog Poll teams. Of course, I had to laugh because the only other reasonable reaction would have been to cry as the losses piled up. Georgetown's season is becoming more monotonous than the USC Fight Song, Virginia got crushed but stayed at #2 because VCU could only manage a split. Virginia Tech swapped with JMU and I'm probably not giving UMBC enough credit at #7. Richmond is back in for the first time since my initial poll, and American forced me to rethink one of my basic rules about the Bog Poll after Old Dominion and Morgan State dropped below .500.

1. Georgetown
Next week, Robbie Madison will attempt to best his New Year’s Eve world record motorcycle jump of 322 feet by jumping the gap between the Hoyas and the Number 2 Bog Poll team.
2. Virginia
The Associated Press article on UVA’s 108-70 loss to Xavier described Sean Singletary’s 14 points in this game as “harmless.” Apparently, Singletary is pre-med and has already taken the Hippocratic Oath and figured that scoring more points would be a violation of Virginia’s honor code. The article also made note of Xavier’s “relentlessly balanced offense.”
3. VCU
Rams relentlessly balanced their week’s record with a win at UNC-Wilmington after losing to James Madison.
4. George Mason
After watching the season premier of “The Wire,” Jim Larranaga decides that his team’s loss to Georgia State was definitely the fault of the Baltimore Sun.
5. James Madison
Dean Smith > Dean Keener > Dean Wormer
6. Virginia Tech
Saturday’s game against the Terps will be the thrilling conclusion of ESPN’s “I can’t believe these are major Division I programs Week.”
7. UMBC
If college basketball were politics, UMBC’s win at New Hampshire would force American and VMI to drop their programs until next season.
8. Maryland
After beating Charlotte, Gary Williams puts names back on players’ lockers but uses erasable ink so they don’t get cocky.
9. Richmond
Tied with Georgetown for longest active Bog Poll win streak of three games. Also like the Hoyas, they play five men on the court at a time. There the similarities end.
10. American
Losing to an Ivy League opponent not starting with the letter P used to be grounds for a minimum two-week suspension from the Bog Poll. Beating one in your next game should not make up for it.